My first real job out of college was at an alternative school in my downtown neighborhood. The kids that attended were not allowed back into “regular” school and considered “bad." New to this gig, I was sure I was going to save them. What I didn’t know was that they were going to save me.
During Computer class one day, I made the mistake of offending a student. Do you know the Bible verse that talks about unintentional sin? I think about this verse every time I think about this situation. I had wronged someone without knowing it, and I almost paid for it. Thankfully, there was a more seasoned teacher in the classroom who saw how the cards were being played, and knew exactly what to do next. Just as fast as she whispered in my ear that I was going to get punched, she threw me outside the door, avoiding a fist to my face. Sometimes I play the scenario over and over again in my head to see what I did wrong. I still don’t know what happened.
We've always viewed ourselves as missionaries so it's been a normal practice to have people come in and out of our home. Shortly after this incident, my husband invited this kid over to hang out. I walk into my living room one day, and this kid who had just tried to punch me was laying on his belly, playing John's twenty-something-year-old NBA Super Nintendo! They made brownies and played all evening long.
I wasn’t being a brat or throwing a fit, but I cried. I cried because this was a beautiful gesture that confronted the ugly in my heart. This was one of those markers that changed who I decided I was going to spend my time with. Up to this point, I could pick who I wanted to be around. I could choose not to spend my time with people with “bad energy” or people who were not like me.
For John to choose friendship with a young man unlike either of us brought me so much conviction. Where he was building a bridge, I was building a wall. In a world where people reject and dispose of relationships so quickly, there needs to be peacemakers and bridge-builders- not wall builders.
So here I am, still trying to figure out how to build bridges... Still trying to be around people not like me because this kind of thing continually forms my heart. This kind of thing, continually saves me from myself.